10 Ways to be an Expert Investor on Social Media!

Pennies & Nonsense!

#10 … Post links to recently announced company results. If you can get off the mark early here, this makes you look smarter than the rest of the pack.

#9 … Quote well-known, high-visibility investing superstars. Often! And you can’t go wrong citing investing legends like Warren Buffett & Jack Bogle.

#8 … Criticise those well-known investing superstars who have hit a slump. They fell into a hole that you didn’t. You’ll look way smarter for having avoided the dumb mistake that the superstar didn’t.

#7 … Cite highbrow investing papers that say most experts cannot match market performance, most of the time. The softly veiled implication being that maybe you can!

#6 … Sound really confident about your recent investment. Justify it with musings on the balance sheet, book value & cashflow. But make sure it doesn’t look like you’re pumping the stock. Classic desperate expert mistake.

#5 … Pump crypto! Nobody has a clue what’s going on with this crap. And you can’t really be criticised for holding a belief in crypto as the new gold. That’s kinda like saying you can’t be feeling what you’re feeling. That’s a big no-no with investing snowflakes these days!

#4 … Talk about having a well-diversified portfolio. Maybe even recommend an ETF or two. Especially one that dilutes your home country bias. Unless, of course, you are really kicking the market’s ass with a focused strategy.

#3 … And if you do have that winning strategy to brag about, go ahead … brag. If you dare! But be ready to run for cover when your red hot portfolio cools. The pack will smell any lack of expertise & will socially annihilate those who screw up.

#2 … Be obscure. Use a whole bunch of big, financey, investy-sounding words. But combine them in phrases that are totally circular, meaningless, & nonsense. Like one of those touchy feely new-age books. Nobody will have a clue what you’re on about. And that makes you sound really clever. You might even be a new-age financial guru!

#1 … One of the best ways to be an expert is to circle jerk with other experts. Get some buddies who are all pumping the same philosophy & stocks that you are. When you & your buddies are all sharing the same stuff, the increase in noise makes it all seem so real. Who knows, you might even move the needle on that penny stock that you want to break even on!

Okay, I’m just having a little fun here. There are some really great investors online. Many of them sharing really good information. My problem is that I can’t figure out how to sort the good ones from the bad. And is it true that I won’t know who the real winning stock pickers are ’til years later??? When it’s all too bloody late! 😜

Who are your go-to financial gurus on social media? I’ve been unfollowing a bunch recently & I need to add some new ones. Send me your winningest gurus. And maybe a few funny ones too! πŸ˜‰πŸ˜

Investing … Vegas Style!

Roll the Dice … Invest!

Las Vegas recently blew off all pandemic restrictions. If I was vaccinated, I’d love to go & join in the fun. But that’s not happening yet. Here, we just got partly released from our tight community lockdown. πŸ™„

As I was dreaming of a Vegas vacation, I got a message from my kid. He remembered that I’d sent him stuff on investing, but he couldn’t remember where to start. Fantastic, I had finally gotten through to him.

Next message read … “What do you think of Bitcoin, Dad?”

Okay … maybe not! πŸ˜†

Hey, I have nothing against buying crypto (especially when you can’t go to Vegas! 😜), but that wasn’t the message I was going for when I was trying to encourage them to save & invest.

I’m no expert, so I played it safe. I went with what Jack Bogle & Warren Buffet have been telling us amateurs to do for years … suggested they look at buying a low-cost index fund. Through a low-fee or no-fee transaction brokerage. And hold it for a long, long, long time. Had I done that myself back at their age, I’d be spending a lot more time in Vegas now! The big advantage kids have is time. Time allows the magic of compound growth to do its thing. A very special thing.

But I’ll have to save that for the next post or they won’t take the time to read this one. They wanted me to send them something in under 280 characters. What’s that about!?! Maybe if I can keep these posts down to a two-minute read, there’s a chance they’ll read them! πŸ€žπŸ»πŸ˜‰

Warning & Disclaimer … I’m a Dad, not a financial advisor or a financial planner. I am not a tax advisor or a lawyer. These posts are for entertainment only & are not investing advice. Do your own due diligence & seek professional advice before making any decisions on saving & investing. This content relates to Canada but, wherever you are, check the rules with your own advisors before making any financial decisions.