Better than Average!?!

Silly things crack me up these days!

So it’s been a week now, since I started this stupid walking thing. That dumb app buzzes & flashes whenever I’m idle for too long. Ever the sucker for those bloody marketers, I bought a new fitness band too. It’s the same brand as my phone & the app, so they all hold secret meetings together, planning on how to get further into my head. And under my skin. They incessantly vibrate on my wrist, in my pocket, & in my ear. It’s orgasmically terrifying. I can’t enjoy a nice lounge on the couch anymore. It’s just brutal.

Then, when I go out for the damn walk, I’m surrounded by these silly little critters. The cavorting squirrels, the oh-so shaggin’ cute little chipmunks, quacking duckies, & soaring eagles. Or are they crows? I don’t feckin’ know, this whole nature thing is for the birds.

Then there’re all those people. All smiley & happy-like. Walking their dumb dogs. The dogs always want to be petted. I feel like I have to do it. Then they wag their tails off & grin at me, tongues flopping out of their mouths with joy. What’s wrong with those creatures!

Worst of all, you have to talk to all the people you meet. Why are they so happy? They’re out walking, for cryin’ out loud, what’s to be happy about!?!

Despite all these challenges, I’ve kept it up for the week. Mainly to keep the apps off my back. Talking about my back, I think I need to see a chiropractor. Maybe a chiropodist too. And I’m not sure if I need a replacement hip, or knee, maybe both. I’m almost wishing the aliens would abduct me & give me an otherworldly makeover.

According to the step-counting app, I’ve gone from the 82nd percentile, all the way up to the top 30% already. Proving, once again, that most people have way more sense than me. The “average” person is at the 41st percentile. Why not 50%? Or is that the median? I don’t know, but now that I’m above average, I never felt less like a winner. I’m a total bloody crock & I’m making absolutely no promises about keeping up this walking thing.

Do I need a walking stick? Hurrruuump! ๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜

Trying to be Kind in an era of Anti-Social Media

Trying to be Kind in an era of Anti-Social MediaAntiSocial Mediea

If you’re thinking I’m avoiding talking about my diet because I’m not doing so well at the moment … you’d be right! ๐Ÿ™‚

For the purpose of this piece, I’m going to blame my current, & hopefully temporary, lack of dietary success on the stresses of social media. Some folk are posting & sharing thoughts & beliefs that I could never have imagined coming out of their mouths. These are nice, kind, feeling, thinking people. I’ve spent time with them, eaten dinner with them, had a beer with them, & I can absolutely say that they are nice people. So why would such nice people flip out every now & again, to spread unkind thoughts, memes & tropes?

We seem to be pretty tribal by nature. We prioritize our family, our friends, our neighborhood, our city, state & country, over those of others. Maybe that’s okay up to a point. But it’s not so okay when we start belittling or taking action to lower the “others” position. If, without changing our own position or circumstance, we somehow feel elevated when we take down another, we are in a bad place.

Today’s social media platforms are an amazing way to stay in touch with family & friends around the world. They can be used to spread fun, joy & happiness. They can also be used as tools to denigrate each other, with the safety of that digital distance & anonymity between us. I have been so surprised by some of the posts & comments in recent times, that I renamed my social media app folder “AntiSocial”. Each time I open a social media app, it’s a quick reminder for me to think before I post.

Remember that old saying: if you don’t have something good to say, say nothing. It’s probably still sound advice, isn’t it? Now, I wish I could claim the high moral ground here & say that I am that kind of person. I wasn’t always & indeed, I’m sometimes not. But I think it’s worth trying to be that guy. And I am occasionally reminded of that, most often when someone has higher expectations of me, than I have of myself. We all have the capability of being good people.

This is a great day to remember all this because today, March 20th, is the International Day of Happiness. And spring arrives today!

Now that sounds like a great day to share a little of the good stuff on social media, doesn’t it!

Peace, love, happiness & all that sloppy, mushy stuff (Cut me some slack, I have to preserve some of my bad boy image here! ) to all of you. I hope each & every one of you finds an extra ration of happiness today, tomorrow, & beyond.

PS … I will get back to the diet talk, please bear with me while I battle my demons! ๐Ÿ™‚