How to Make Skinny People Fat

How to Make Skinny People Fat

Haggis & Chips

Comfort Food! Aaahhh!!!

You have no idea how difficult my life can be sometimes. I have a lot of expertise in how to get fat. I’m lucky enough to share my life with someone who doesn’t get fat. Wait a minute, let me rephrase that: I am lucky enough to share my life with someone who is even luckier, not because she’s get to share her life with me, but simply because she doesn’t get fat! Indeed, every now & again, she’ll come to me & say something totally & utterly excruciating, like …

“I’m down a few pounds & I don’t think it suits me, what should I eat?”, with that look of total innocence on her face.

Is she just trying to torment me or what!?!

But of course, ever dutiful when called upon, I will immediately try to help her out. Yesterday, & I’m still in my flu-season-comfort-food mindset, I thought I’d marry my own desire for comfort food with her desire to add a few pounds. I’d just have to eat a bit less of whatever pound-padding creation I concocted.

It’s no surprise that our favourite comfort foods come from our younger years, but choices were limited. We were busy yesterday & didn’t have time to hit the grocery store, so the cupboards were pretty bare. There was a decent selection of healthy choices but that wasn’t what either of us was looking for. I unearthed a can of haggis and, wonder of wonders, a can of baked beans! There are always frozen fries in the freezer so that was it: the complete fattening meal. A can of fatty meaty bits, loaded with oats to soak up & disguise the sheer volume of fat. A can of potentially healthy beans that are swimming in a sugary tomato sauce. And spuds so finely slivered so as to maximise the grease-attracting surface area of a veggie that might otherwise be healthy.

Now I must admit to enjoying my combo platter of sugar, fat & starch. Unfortunately, the Skinny One wasn’t enjoying hers. She’s not a big fan of haggis. The beans weren’t like the ones she had as a child. And there were too many fries on the plate. OMG!!!

While she went off to boil an egg, to accompany the single slice of Jarlsberg cheese she placed on a small plate, I finished off her leftovers. Only about 90% of the original meal! I know, I’m weak. What can I say. Other than I enjoyed her’s too.

After that amazing little keto-friendly “dinner” she had prepared for herself, she then went to prepare dessert. It was some kind of upside-down pineapple cake. With ice cream.

“Would you like one too?”, she inquired. More of that innocence in play!!!

I should have pulled the battery out of the scale last night, but I didn’t. So this morning: I’m up, she’s not. And we might have to go through this exercise all over again today. Aaarrrrghhhh!

Good thing we’re all out of haggis & baked beans! 🙂

Results … Month #3

Results … Month #3After 3 Months

Well, well … another 7 lbs down for the month of September, for a total of 24 lbs for the first 3 months. I think that’s pretty good!

I’m not sure what the “perfect” rate of weight loss is but I’m guessing this is in the ballpark. I’ve been down the high-speed weight loss path before &, while it’s very rewarding to see the scale numbers drop quickly, those are tough diets to do. Even tougher to sustain over time. And all too easy to rebound from. The irony of this month’s progress is that I felt I wasn’t doing the right thing for most of the month. It was a sloppy month, during which I ate far more French fries, chocolate & ice cream than was my intent. I didn’t always choose the best ingredients for my meals so that, more often than not, sausage & hot dogs won out over wild caught fish & grass-fed beef. I was definitely way short on leafy greens. And I can’t recall successfully doing one full wake-cycle fast. I think the few times I tried, they all broke down by dinner time. And some even sooner than that. It was just that kind of crazy month.

On the bright side, I remember at least two occasions where I left food on my plate. Not because I felt I should but simply because I’d had enough. That’s new. You don’t get to my weight by leaving food on the plate! Are the natural control mechanisms starting to cut back in again? The other interesting thing is that I wasn’t hungry, between meals, during the month. Was I tempted to eat something totally off script? Of course! Watching the skinny people eat a totally synthetic sticky pudding, slathered with Baileys infused whipped cream, is torture. But my own dark cherry ice cream, (sometimes with a little hit of Baileys), is a pretty good substitute. So far though, this regimen is proving to be satisfying, quite flexible, and it seems to hold up, reasonably well, under pressure.

I don’t want to tempt fate by celebrating too much, nor too early in the process, but it is encouraging. Okay, it’s really quite (fill in the blanking adjective!) wonderful! 🙂

What’s to come for the month of October?

I wish I knew!

All at the same time I’m guardedly optimistic , yet anxious that it won’t hold up. I’m worried that I’ll fall off the wagon. Maybe I’ll come down with some awful illness. A fast food commercial will get to me. Maybe someone will hold me down & stuff candies into my face!

Or is it time to start experimenting on how to integrate the occasional glass of wine into my dietary regimen!?!?! 🙂

Dieting on the Road

Dieting on the Road

Tandoori Platter

It’s not as challenging to eat “well” on the road as we dieters like to imagine. I’m not talking about going the chicken salad route (hold the chicken skin, the croutons, the dressing and the dried fruit & nut pieces) … you can do that if you want but that’s not how I diet!

Yes, you have to have some dialogue with the server. And yes, they’ll probably think you’re a bit of a pain. But better that than blow the diet. Again!

On the road last week, I was led towards an Indian restaurant this particular evening. And that was just fine by me. I pretty much love all food but if you forced me to pick just one national cuisine, I might have to go with Indian. As it happened, I was on a low-carb regimen that particular day. Oh boy!

I love rice, naan, samosa & pakora but those were not going to be allowed today. Yes, there were salad options. And yes, there were vegetarian dishes aplenty. But I was drawn to the Tandoori Platter. Right away, the word platter promises a gut-busting feast of goodies. And it was. Beef, chicken, lamb, shrimp and who knows what else. There were some token veggies in there too, just to assuage any little fear I might entertain of it being an unhealthy choice. One of the key reasons for this choice was that it didn’t come with a sauce, Tandoori dishes are dry spiced. And I refused to ask about their spice recipe … just in case there were any bad ingredients in there that would have forced me to order that chicken salad! I do love those sauces, by the way, but there’s always some bad stuff hiding in them. And today was to be as sugar & starch-free as any reasonable road warrior could make it.

The bottom line was that it was delicious. I was stuffed. And I was sufficiently fortified to resisted all the starchy temptations offered by my dining companions!

But did it work?

I don’t know!

I’ll have to wait for the official end-of-month weigh-in on October 1st to see how it all plays out. Though I might have been grateful that I didn’t have my scale with me during my travels!


Gurus & Diets

Gurus & DietsCows & Flowers

I’ve always loved modern gurus. You know the kind I’m talking about, the ones that leap & bound around the stage, exhorting us to be the best we can be. No! We can be even better than that! These days we sometimes call them life coaches. You can take courses on how to be a life coach so there are life coach coaching gurus to follow now. I’m guessing most graduates of such courses do a good job but when I spend my hard earned money, I want to see a superstar in action. I want to be entertained, motivated, exhorted to the max. There are gurus like this in every field. Promising athletic levels of fitness, bodybuilder musculature, huge wealth through investment & real estate schemes, all of which will make us rich beyond our imagination. And, of course, there are the gurus of diet.

While I am still entertained by such figures, & I continue to listen & learn from them, I’m aware that my initial enthusiasm wanes back to normal after about 3 days. Since most of us who listen to these highly motivating people are not slim & fit millionaires, I’m guessing that decline in enthusiasm happens for most people. I’m disappointed with myself when that happens, of course. I know it’s not the gurus fault, it’s mine. I didn’t do it right. I didn’t follow the rules. I didn’t step up. I’m not suggesting that it doesn’t work for some people, it certainly does. The testimonials are there to prove it. Over the long haul though, it just doesn’t seem to work for me.

This seems particularly apt when it comes to diet. Weight loss feels like it should be more of a leisurely walking marathon. Perhaps with a little jog here & there. For me, it’s certainly not an explosive, short, sharp sprint to the finish. It’s difficult to maintain such a high level of intensity all the way down to our goal weight. There is nothing wrong with an occasional sprint. But for most of us, most of the time, we need a strategy that allows us to succeed at a slower pace. One that allows us to still feel good while the finish line is out of reach. A system that, somehow, hangs in there when we’re just not feeling that super-high level of motivation. A lifestyle that doesn’t demand huge sacrifice each & every day.

We could really use an approach that is more suited to that pace of living. Not one aligned with wishful thinking. We need an approach that is flexible enough to match the realities of actually living life.

Now that’s all starting to sound quietly amazing, restful even. Despite the low key, I’m almost a believer already. And that’s without all the motivational theatrics!

But I wonder if my scale will agree with me when I return from vacation! LOL

No Fails with a Fast!

No Fails with a Fast!


Imagine you’re on a ketogenic diet. You have just one little cookie. You feel like a failure, don’t you. You’ve hit reset. It’s just a big No-No. The ketones immediately run & hide. It’s over. The cycle is done for. Finished. Let’s start again next Monday.

The great thing with intermittent fasting is that it’s impossible to fail. There aren’t as many fasting programs out as there are diets but there’s enough variety that just about everyone can find one that suits. I embrace them all. Going for a 48 hour fast, but you decide to eat lunch the 2nd day? Congrats! You’ve just successfully completed a 42 hour fast instead. Enjoy your lunch!

Fasting, an ancient practice, is the new diet du jour. And there might be something to it. I’m trying to get my head around something more than a one day fast. My ideal one day fast is spending a total wake cycle without food. Though I do add a little heavy cream (35%) to my coffee, I limits my fluids to coffee, tea & water. Since I’m well practiced at not eating breakfast, I won’t have breakfast next morning either. That really turns my one day fast into a 42 hour fast. If I make it to dinner time, I’ve accomplished a 48 hour fast. Bonus points!

The worst case scenario is that you finish dinner at 7pm today. Then you have breakfast at 7am tomorrow. Congratulations again … you’ve completed a 12 hour fast. While doing this every day probably won’t contribute a lot to weight loss, at least we haven’t destroyed a diet “prescription” that we’ve given ourselves. There’s no feeling of having to binge for the rest of the week, while we wait for Monday to roll around before we begin again. You can always start the next fast right away, immediately following breakfast. Or you can go through to dinner time & start over then. The whole diet isn’t shot. There are no big regrets. And you haven’t lost the “rest of the week”. It’s still there to be taken advantage of. When you’re ready.

About the only thing that does mess with my head, while running my infrequent fasting routines, is the scale. I know, I know, we should only weight ourselves once a week. Forget that, I’m on the scale at least twice a day! And that can sometimes show unpredictable results. I don’t have a scale that is calibrated to a standard or anything but it seems pretty repeatable when I load up a heavy weight on it. It’s on a hard, even floor. I’ve even positioned it far away from the vent, so that heating & cooling draughts don’t influence the outcome. Despite that care & attention, it sometimes says that I didn’t lose any weight after a fast day. But then it surprises me with a loss a feast day. What is that about!?!

This is not a consistent thing. I’m really not sure why some fasts give me an immediate result, while others don’t. And why would a feast day, sometimes a pretty wicked one, give me a pleasant surprise?

I don’t know the answer &, frankly, I don’t care too much. I enjoy the pleasant surprises every now & again. The message is to not give up on your fasting regimen too soon. Let your scale play it’s little games & see if the results work this way for you.