Spice Up Your Diet!

We are, of course, delighted that our skinny spouses & partners are not suffering the weight problems that torment us, aren’t we? However, most of them don’t realise how much they torture us sometimes. I go to great lengths when I’m test driving a new diet. I buy all the right foods. I have all my tools at the ready. I write up a menu plan, a schedule, & who know what else, so that I don’t have to think about anything. I plan the work & work the plan, no deliberation required. I’ll be three days into it, doing really well, when my better, & far-lighter, half will open a new bag of chocolate truffles!

“These are delicious, Paul!”, she’ll say.

“You can probably have just one, can’t you?”, she’ll say. Looking at me, all wide-eyed & innocent, eyebrows raised, waiting for me to capitulate.

It feels like everyone we know wants to conspire against us when we’re trying to lose weight. What on earth is going through their minds? The people at work bring boxes of doughnuts, with exhortations that we simply must have just one. We can’t only have a salad when everyone goes out to the local burger joint for lunch on Friday. And family gatherings are a total nightmare.

“Ah, go on, one slice won’t hurt you!”

My only advice is that when you’re trying out a diet, don’t take advice from anyone that isn’t on the same diet. Neither should we take advice from any skinny people. And we especially shouldn’t take advice from the skinny people that are closest to us!

It’s time to turn the tables on these skinny people in our lives. If they really want to help us, they should do something that we want them to do. And something that will work in favour of what we’re trying to achieve.

I’m going to ask my better half to try suggesting sex next time she is overcome with a desire to help me with my diet! 😀😀😀